Change in myself

So I have been doing alot of thinking lately and one main thing is my parenting. Well In my opinion I think I am a good mom, I would do anything for my kids, I take care of them, comfort them, get them things they need, and love teaching them things. Those are the things I am good at when it comes to being a mother to my girls. But here lately, I have came across some things I don't like about myself as a parent. One is that I have found myself yelling constantly at them. Yes I yell and I know it makes them feel bad, but then I think I got my point across. Then after I do, I feel bad and tell myself I need to control my anger tone alittle when it comes to disiplining the girls. But then its like its become a habit, I yell again. Sometimes I feel like I repeat myself over and over again and it gets so frustrating, that I take it out on Chirsta alot, when I really shouldn't have. Yes I think being a Military wife with a husband that is deployed and I am left alone to take care of EVERYTHING, has alot to do with this change in myself. I don't wanna be hateful to my kids, thats not me. But lately, I have noticed I use to be and have now tried my best to handle things in a much better manner then yelling. Don't get me wrong, I still find myself yelling, because of habit, but then I feel so terrible about myself. I have prayed to god to come into my heart and take this anger, sadness, tension, or whatever it is out of me and bring back the happier me. I can't blame it all on my hubsand being gone, because alot of it is probably me just not knowing how to handle my stress sometimes, but it does make it hard when I am the only one to handle everything in the home for now. I believe I am a strong woman and it does take a strong woman to be a military wife. I had no doubts that I could take on everything with my hubby being gone, just now after a couple of months, I am realizing some things I don't like about myself and I wanna change. I know my girls love me and just today at the grocery store, one guy told me that my girls are angels compared to some kids hes seen. So it makes me feel good to know that I have well behaved girls. But don't let them fool ya, they have their days and yeah so does mom. I guess I just need to continue praying and controling the way I handle situations with my kids. I think I can do it. But I think what really caught my attention that I was yelling alot, was when Christa would yell at her younger sisters. So I though to myself, "Do I really sound like that to her?"I don't want my girls growning up thinking all I do is yell. So I am gonna work on myself and pray that god will be with me and help me get back to myself again.

Gonna Shop Smart

So I decided I need to start shopping smarter, so for the first time I just printed out a few food coupons to take with me tomorrow to go shopping. I am gonna try and continue to do this, cause sometimes I tend to go over board.
Well hubby and I had some disagreements this week, but we talked them out and are ok now. We are still waiting on our taxes to come in..They told us the 30th, and its 1:58am and they aren't in there yet. So maybe I am just too anxious. IDK, but I have been talking to hubby through email and I am exhausted now. So I will write more tomorrow. night all!

Wordless Wed

My Pretty Pretty Princesses!





































For more wordless Wed go here 5 mins for mom

update

Well we are on day 3 with my new dietary pills, and I have to say, I DO HAVE MORE ENERGY! and its been cleaning me out. YEAH TMI I know! LOL Anyhow, not much going on here. I am still trying to find myself and what kind of career would be best for me. Haven't decided, or well I have one in mind, but not sure about it yet. WE are anxiously waiting for Friday to get here, so I can pay some bills, get some groceries, and FINALLY get our WII and WII FIT! I just can't wait to start playing it. Christa has already made a list of wii games she likes. And I am just anxious to get fit and start losing more weight. I am struggling alittle with Alexa on her potty training. I tried real underwear today after she went pee on the potty, and then I was gonna wait a half hour and take her in there again, but she already had a accident. So its still a work in progress. Some days are good and she'll go on her own, or come and get me to go with her, and somedays, maybe she just wants to be lazy or is too into playing and don't wanna go. I don't know, but I need to start getting more strict with her and make her sit longer. I keep the potty book in there and she likes looking at it while shes on the toliet..lol Sometimes I read it to her too. Maddi well I finally got her prescription and have continue using the cream on her and we go back to the Urologist for a check up Feb 17th. She is doing really good and Wow I still can't believe she is gonna start Pre-K this fall. I registered online for the VPK, so I guess I will be getting papers on where to go to get her signed up. Well thats it, I think I am gonna head to bed.